Social Awkwardness

Evidence  

Social Cognition in Children Born Preterm: A Perspective on Future Research Directions 

Zmyj N, Witt S, Weitkämper A, Neumann H, Lücke T. 

Abstract: Preterm children face problems in social interactions. These problems might be based on difficulties in social-cognitive skills and can be moderated by parental behavior. The emphasis on preterm children’s motor, physiological, and intellectual development in past research should be enriched by a closer look at preterm children’s social-cognitive development. 

Education 

Between 1 and 3 years old children are learning how to be around others. This includes how to play, communicate and respond to people. Some toddlers may feel unsure or awkward in social situations as they learn these new skills. 

Social awkwardness in toddlers is common and a normal part of development. Your child is still learning how to understand social rules, express their feelings and interact with others. 

You may notice your toddler: 

• Prefers to play alone or stay close to you 

• Finds it hard to join in with other children 

• Avoids eye contact at times 

• Becomes shy or quiet in new situations 

• Takes time to warm up around new people 

• Struggles with sharing or taking turns 

• May seem unsure of how to play with others 

At this age, many toddlers play alongside other children rather than directly with them. This is called parallel play and is a normal stage of development. 

Temperament also plays an important role in how children behave socially. Temperament is your child’s natural “style” – the way they react to people and situations. It is something children are born with, and there is no “good” or “bad” temperament. Some toddlers are more outgoing and eager to join in, while others are quieter, more cautious, or take longer to feel comfortable. Children with a “slow‑to‑warm” temperament, for example, may appear shy or awkward at first but gradually become more confident with time and support. 

Your child is still learning how to understand emotions, both their own and other people’s. They may not yet know how to respond in social situations, which can sometimes look like awkwardness. For some children, especially those who were born early or have had medical or hospital experiences, social situations may feel overwhelming. They may need extra time and support to feel safe and confident. 

If your child’s social skills seem very different from other children their age, or if they continue to struggle over time, it can be helpful to speak with your GP or child health professional. 

Empowerment 

It is important to remember that all children develop social skills at their own pace. Some toddlers are more outgoing, while others are more cautious or quiet. Both are part of normal development. 

You can support your child by creating safe and gentle opportunities for social interaction. 

There are many ways to help your child build confidence: 

• Stay close to your child in new or busy environments 

• Give them time to watch before joining in 

• Use simple language to guide social interactions, like “let’s take turns” 

• Praise small steps, like saying hello or joining play 

• Keep playdates small and calm to avoid overwhelm 

Following your child’s lead helps them feel safe. When your child feels secure, they are more likely to try new social experiences. 

If your child finds social situations difficult, try not to rush them. Confidence grows over time with patience and support. 

For families who would like extra support, Miracle Babies Foundation NurtureGroup is a free play and support group for children from birth to starting school who have been impacted by a premature or sick birth, time in a neonatal unit, or ongoing medical challenges. 

NurtureGroups provide a safe and inclusive space where children can learn and develop through play at their own pace. Parents and carers can connect with others, share experiences, and build supportive networks. This can help both you and your child feel more confident in social situations. 

Useful Links 

Sydney Children’s Hospital 

https://www.schn.health.nsw.gov.au/kids-health-hub/growth-and-development/toddlers/social-emotional 

The Royal Children's Hospital Melbourne 

https://www.rch.org.au/kidsinfo/fact_sheets/challenging_behaviour_toddlers_and_young_children/ 

Miracle Babies Foundation 

https://www.miraclebabies.org.au/content/social-avoidance/gn17zs 

https://www.miraclebabies.org.au/content/nurturegroup/gk5p54 

Need support? NurtureConnect allows you to connect with our NurtureProgram support team, or call our 24 hour NurtureLine 1300 622 243 or join our Facebook community.

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